Perch "The Thoughtful Pause Podcast"

Listen to your heart, your purpose is calling: Part 2 with Genevieve Piturro

Tree & Toby Genevieve Piturro Episode 25

Send us a text

Have you ever felt like a greater purpose is calling you, but you're not quite sure how to answer it? Genevieve Piturro, the visionary behind the Pajama Program, joins us to unravel the mysteries of finding life's purpose, sharing an exercise that goes beyond standard goal-setting to unearth your true passions. Our heartfelt conversation reveals how this practice transformed my own perspective, proving it's never too late to align your life with intention and passion. Whether you're poised to take a bold leap or prefer a gentle slide into new beginnings, Genevieve's insights are a beacon for anyone on the path to self-discovery.

This episode swings open the doors to the powerful realm of intention and how it can elevate our spirit when we live purposefully. Amid the relentless hustle and bustle of reality TV and endless scrolling through social media, we explore the necessity to connect with our deeper selves. I get candid about my own eureka moments, the challenges of vulnerability, and the illusion that time has run out to pursue our dreams. We also celebrate the sheer joy and gratitude that overflows when you find alignment with your true self. 

Wrapping up this motivational journey, we ponder how pursuing purpose isn't just personal; it's also a powerful force in business, inspiring companies to leave a meaningful legacy. Through reflections inspired by Oprah's literary wisdom and the concept of a 'purpose quotient' for organizations, Genevieve and I discuss the essential connection between business, purpose, and community. The authenticity that comes from facing our fears and living with intention, I invite you to join us in making art, peace, love, and happiness our compass for the year ahead. Let's move forward together with purpose and leave our unique, indelible marks on the world.
https://www.genevievepiturro.com

Let's all keep searching to expand our view!

Speaker 1:

Well. Greetings and welcome back fellow perchers and again, happy holidays to everybody. I hope everybody's having a safe and happy holiday season. Hopefully you caught the first part of this interview with Genevieve Patero If you didn't go back. We did a great intro and, by the way, it was absolutely brilliant. It was mostly brilliant, anyway. It's easy to do a good intro when you have a great guest with us and Genevieve joins us again today. Just a little bit of background. Genevieve was really the founder of the pajama program and really the conversation is about the creation of a purpose to create. Everybody should be able to look at their lives and be able to look at ways to add purpose, not only in their lives but in the world we live in. So, trie, do you want to kind of dive into?

Speaker 2:

that a little bit I do, and I'm sorry. I just need to go back and see one if you didn't see it, or while I'm starting off with tissue, it's emotional.

Speaker 1:

Everybody get your tissue, you're going to need it.

Speaker 2:

I got emotional through the break so I'm trying to keep it together. So if I fall apart I'm not crazy, it's just really good content. I want to kind of turn this over to Genevieve and just explain, have her explain to the guest. You could go to her website and she'll share that with you. And she actually has an exercise and a process to help us find our purpose and I took it. So I'll give you the insight, a little details about my results, of my finding, but I would like for you to explain it a little.

Speaker 3:

Sure. Thank you, trie. Yes, anyone who is wondering if they're living their purpose or if you know you're not, and you know what it is. And if you know you're not, you don't know what it is. If you go to find your purpose, exercise on my website. 90 minutes, I say, is what you need. An hour's too short. You start to count down after you get to the 30 minute mark, start looking for the clock, and 90 minutes is a good amount of time to get lost in yourself, which is what you need to do. So quiet space, no interruptions. Put a note on the door, mommy's busy, daddy's doing something, whatever you need to do, and take the time for yourself, and I say you can have a glass of wine, you can have a cup of tea, you can have a pizza, doesn't matter, just as long as you have you paper and pen and resist typing on a laptop, because this is really 90 minutes to connect with your heart, and it's just magic that flows when you use pen to paper the old fashioned way. Just let yourself feel freer and I'll let you read the details, and I'm anxious to hear Trie's experience.

Speaker 3:

It starts, let's let your mind go and just think of, I think I say tend to start with things you love to do, however many things you love to do. But the key is to feel when you read the name of what you put knitting children, dogs, teaching, helping people get better, sick people get better. Whatever it is is nothing to do with being nonprofit founder. It has to do with what you love to do. You may have done it once and you may do it every day, but feel those things as you write them and start to cross off the ones that are not standing out the way. Two or three might, and just be free. Nobody's going to follow up on anything with you, but it's just whittle that down through the exercise of how they feel to you and get it down to just a few. And there's an hour a week dedicated to the maybe two. If you get it down to two, maybe three, that you can immerse yourself in that topic. And again, has it feel to you to be immersed in that topic? Just an hour, you could be just researching it, you could be talking to somebody who's in that field, you could be volunteering to help in that field, even if it's not nonprofit. Just put yourself in that position.

Speaker 3:

And I also want to add. We can talk about this further. Don't scare yourself into thinking that I'm asking you to quit your job. Don't go there because I teach a slide and a jump. I have the jump gene. I don't know why some of us do, some of us don't. But if you even slide what your number one Love in this world to do, to be immersed in, even if you slide it into your life For one hour a week, that will change everything, will change how you feel about you. It will change how you feel about life. It will change how you feel about waking up. It'll change how people feel being near you. So that's an overview and tree. Maybe we can get into specifics, absolute, some of your questions and your observations?

Speaker 2:

Absolutely one before I get into it. Please let's talk about the jump gene before we in, let's not gene. Yes, a serious slider here, a Crawl gene and I'm a jump gene. So really one for people that don't know what that means, explain it before we close out. But I, I Got a breathe, so I don't start off emotional, so I can get through this a little insight about me. I I am a person who does a vision board every year. I Am a visionary, I believe in vision, writing things down. So for me, in In my mind, I thought me doing this, this purpose exercise wouldn't be as purposeful as for some people. I was like because I try to live my life and it's it. Boy, am I wrong? So for anybody that's watching first, if 90 minutes is Intimidating to you to spend that much time with stillness and along with Aloneness, this is your, the universe telling you you must do this.

Speaker 1:

They spend that much time on Amazon, for God's sake.

Speaker 2:

Twitter is Cyber Monday, I'm pretty sure most people Well, whatever day it is that's going, on, black Friday or whatever the specials are, you lost more time on those days. Then you doing that on this. But if we can't take time for us to check in with us, that's the universe telling you is definitely time if you start off saying that's a lot, that 90 minutes is not enough time for self-care to begin with. That's just my opinion, so let me tell you my experience. So I did exactly what you said. I literally I said my prayer first, I did my breath and I said give my ego out the way and and let it flow and I use the pen, the pad. Like he stated, I got to ten quick. I know some people are gonna struggle, but I got to ten quick.

Speaker 2:

Your next exercise say get the ten down to five. So when? And getting to the ten? For me, just specifically, the part of the process that was transformative the most is summarizing within two words. So when I took those ten steps and for each steps I took two words that kind of summarized that, that statement oh my god. And so I'm gonna tell you what happened for me. So, when I took that ten because I had those two words. I was, it was so easy for me to get to the five.

Speaker 2:

But what I noticed and when I got to the five, to try to we leave with intention and say, okay, literally, there was one time, one of the statements, when I went to write my two down. It was so powerful and so strong, I crossed it out and I was like no, this doesn't even sound like me. And then I said wait a minute, the exercise is to let my heart speak, not my head, not my feelings. And I put it back down on paper and when I got down to the last three, the two words in each word was connected, had a spiritual connection. I went back through nothing else, dead. One of them literally said my two words. My statement was what do I feel in this moment? Because that's what, when you write those statements, part of the exercise is the feeling that you got in a Moment and I said when I do this particular act, I'm connected to the divine.

Speaker 3:

Love that.

Speaker 2:

I Soft, I saw I had no clue. I had no clue and it's such power in putting words behind your actions and attention. And my three were all had without intention and the intention put in that were spiritually connected and I knew I was like there is no way, if these three acts Connects me to a power that's greeted in me, that is not purposeful and and um, yeah, so I got through it. See, I did.

Speaker 3:

That's the best, if we could all allow ourselves to feel that connection, because we are connected and just the same. As I was saying, before we mess ourselves up, I mean, we make a muck, a muck, we just put ourselves in the mud, and it's so simple, it should be so simple, mm-hmm, like that, and that's great, that's. That's amazing that you, that you got there. I got there too, but I didn't realize it with the kids. You know as quickly as you did in 90 minutes. I realized it in time. What was feeding me. That connection with that little girl was spiritual.

Speaker 1:

And I'm glad you mentioned the noise, because I think we and we talk about this on so many of our Our episodes how the world is its own worst enemy in many cases and how we over complicate things. And we did an episode even on like the golden bachelor and and you know these types of things that are just, with all due respect, they're kind of noise, they're just they're out there filling our time, not necessarily in a productive manner, and I mean I don't want to get too, too hard on like reality TV shows or surfing the web or tick-tock or Instagram, but they take us away from our purpose, don't they? Don't they kind of steal some of that time that we have?

Speaker 3:

Yes, but I think, sadly, a lot of us look for those distractions Because I think for some of us that deep feeling is uncomfortable, which is sad to even say, but people don't let themselves Cry, they don't let themselves feel. And also, I think a lot of people, if they get to the point you got tree they, instead of looking at it as a gift, they're disappointed or they're, they think that they've wasted time and they're not worthy and they can't do it now, or it's, it's not a gift, like you took it as a gift and you embraced it, and I think that's what we're meant to do.

Speaker 2:

And I think the and I'm so glad you said that, because I've gotten at a lot I and that was too late for me, or if I were to discover this younger, or it's what's the purpose of doing exercise like this one. So much of life is behind me, but the mere fact that we still have breath in our body, the mere fact that's intention and its purpose is flowing through us, lets us know it's still time, and so I spend my time in gratitude. I could easily say, like you, I've been in corporate America 30 years. I could easily say now, if I just knew that then and I could have worked towards this purpose 30 years ago. Imagine, let it go, the fact that I'm blessed to have it now and in this moment. So now I have my know star and I, and I have confirmation that if I can take what this finding is and do that forever, how long I have left on this planet, and it connects me to the divine, divine, and it and it helps my fellow man and it gives me joy and love and passion.

Speaker 2:

I want to do that. So we pulled well, as we say, we pulled the dirty in around me and and if that's if I get it a year or five years attempt, what difference does it make? I did it right and you hear success stories and people often now tell Colonel Sander story how you know how long it took him to be like 60 years old before you know he was Colonel Sanders and but but it doesn't matter his name, his legacy is going to live on forever. So if we get it in a year or two years before we hear, let's just find our purpose and and get it while we're still here.

Speaker 1:

I wanted to ask sorry I was gonna ask you for about an emotion and that I, when I lived in Florida for years, I used to give my time to to a program there where we would work with the fifth and sixth graders to teach them soft skills, communication skills, interactive skills, you know, a conflict resolution and and the schools would thank me and I would say purely selfishly I do this because I love this. I get more out of than you ever will when you find your purpose. Do you find that's the same emotion? I mean, do you believe in your heart of hearts that you get as much out of the pajama program as the people that are actually getting that?

Speaker 3:

yes, and I know we had lots of volunteers come to me on the side and say almost the same thing I've heard a million times. You wouldn't believe what's going in my life right now. I almost canceled, didn't come. This has taken me so out of my pain and back to my joy and this has been, you know, an amazing game changer for me.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yes, there is there is a, there is a, you know, whatever it is a muscle out there that when you see people really light up and you could feel the joy in the room, that that just fills your. It fills you. I mean, like I said, I always looked at it very selfishly. I do this because of what I get back and and so it really is kind of a a self. You know it's a circular kind of motion.

Speaker 3:

So yeah, yeah, it's contagious, but you're happy absolutely other people are happy. They feel it.

Speaker 1:

It's we're connected, it's energy, it's the human connection yeah, so now you started with children, but now you do a lot more than that now um, yes, we, we did 20 some years with infant to 18 is the group homes would then release.

Speaker 3:

They were released legally once a child was 18 in most cases. So even we did a lot of teens bedtime, as is very, very important, you know, for these, for these children. So now, in three years ago, I passed a baton of executive directorship because I wanted to inspire others to hopefully do what we're talking about, to dig deep and to to to find something that moves you and will move others and change the world. Literally sounds like a crazy idea, but we, we really have to, we really have to do this now, I think to to bond with each other, absolutely, because COVID started a terrible time when we were isolated and it's hard for some people to get back into connecting. You know, and I and I think we, we need to find, come out of ourselves and and just give, and people will realize if they're strong and brave and courageous enough to do that, how it, how it just feels better all around.

Speaker 3:

It's like we're doing things for little kids now, to try to teach them if they are able to comprehend, due to their age and also the situation they're in and the caregivers, how important it is not to brush off bedtime. You know, the people that I saw when I went to the emergency shelters were loving people, but there wasn't a bedtime routine and the doors closed and that was it go to sleep. And I used to leave thinking how could they, how can they just go to sleep just because they closed the lights, you know. So the bedtime routine now is key so that they can drift into a peaceful state, following some rituals that I had and I thought everybody had.

Speaker 2:

And I was thinking when you the statement that you make, and I'm going blank on his name, but Oprah has a book that's out now with the professor from Harvard and it was in that that's the point of connection and human connection and how it is necessary. And he and I thought about the example he gave. When even look at commercials, he goes. It's a reason why when they advertise, you know, and severe commercial, for example, the person isn't sat in his apartment with his beer and joined a game. What makes it joyful is having a beer with others and collaboration and making a point. Well, we were that's when we get to pure joy. It's, you know, you can enjoy your solitude and your loneliness, but true joy comes when you share that with someone else and bring someone else into the fold. And one other thing, a point that I wanted to make early about purpose, and this is something I discovered a while ago and it may be a questionable stance because people say, well, I'm just not sure that purpose is real or not.

Speaker 2:

Everyone has a purpose and we talked about it and I and I and I bought up to years and years ago I had this conversation about purpose with someone else and I said. Just think of the intentionality in which we were all created. I said it's over 7 billion people on the planet. None of us have the same fingerprint hair follicles. All that attention was purposeful, you know, and and as far as the collaboration, I say even in our environment and our elements, and and in the ecosystem. It was designed to need each other. Me like the, the scene needs the, the air, and since water up and you know the clouds, give us rain, bring it back down in our ecosystem is telling you we have to connect. There is a need for all of us, from plants and animals, and that this is how we grow and it's part of the growth process.

Speaker 1:

So I agree with the point. It's intentional, yeah, yeah, on our last podcast we talked about why stay, and it was a lot about the the fact that corporations, companies are not people and they don't act like people. But yeah, as we talk about purpose, I can't help but think can't companies have purpose as well?

Speaker 3:

Yes, absolutely they can, and leaders, founders, are responsible for the vision. So, how do we?

Speaker 1:

get there. I mean so much of it. So many of us work in organizations where it's it's P and L driven, it's KPI driven. It's not like what we many people may know about things like conscious capitalism, but how do we get a, an organization of people, to act like an organization of people?

Speaker 3:

Well, it starts with the top right it does. It starts with the person who founded the company and the person who's leading it, but mostly if you have the founder there, the founder founded it for a reason yes, they wanted to make money, but they made a box, and a box helps people, helps people move, it helps people save precious things, it helps protect things. There's there's a reason for every every company's existence and there's a reason that it's positive. I don't think that a company can can start and last if they're destructive from day one. So there was a point where there was if not continually still is a purpose. Somebody had a reason that it would do some good. It would be something people would want to have to bring some kind of peace, joy, love, some positive thing to them. So it's going to take time, but we're sort of forced now to really reignite that purpose in that person that started it or in the leadership team, because people are running every day looking for something better.

Speaker 1:

Should organizations, like people, worry about their legacy? And if so, I'm just thinking, as you said that how do we, as consumers, know if a company is good? I mean, should we have a purpose quotient or a purpose score that says this is a good company to work for, because they care and they give back and they have purpose? I mean, how do we, how do we help those organizations? Because everybody gets driven by the P and L right. So you know, all of a sudden and we say this all the time we know we shouldn't buy from this particular folks because they support slave labor. And then, in the middle of the night, guess what? We just ordered something from them. Why? Because it was 20 cents cheaper. How do we support people that share our values and have purpose?

Speaker 3:

Well, I think if we know people who work there, it's the people who work there that can give us clues. It's not just what they say and what they put out there and how many millions of dollars they give to a nonprofit because they could be treating their employees terribly and that's not good. This qualifies them, in my book, from being good if their people are not feeling and are being treated well. So I think it's good to know and to support companies. When we meet the people who say I enjoy working there and they are good to us and I believe in our product, that's the best way to get to know somebody. And we can all find somebody who works there. We can all look at their writing, the things they put out, the communication.

Speaker 3:

But if you can meet people who work there and support them, how many times have I said, how many times have you said, that company has those people that we know working for them and they're really happy and they like it there. So let's buy their ice cream, let's buy their. That's why I think people love to buy local. They like to buy local fruit, they like to buy local produce, they like to buy things made locally. You see the people. You know they care. It's not always possible, but I think that people know that if they can meet the people closer to the organization, they'll get a good feeling about whether it's the right company for them to support or not.

Speaker 2:

So since Toby opened his door, I am going to put this out in the universe because this is what I would like to see. For the longest we didn't have labels. So now for women who use cosmetics, there's branding to tell you that this is no animals or harm in the creation of this, and so there's a symbol. We have that now we buy cosmetics for food there's organic or GMO free. So we have all these labels in the universe. I want to see business have labels that they don't buy.

Speaker 2:

I want us to know that this company because the employees said it and not the shareholders, because the people that actually work there and say this company does well is a good corporate citizen by its people and we need to know it because we need to be able to support it. Because we went to for a while when America started exporting more, started importing more than they exporting. We went to Made in America, so we had that label and people went and I want to see and I'm putting it in a verse and I want to do whatever I can to, I think, corporate corporations, because there's still some out there. It's businesses that are people centric, and Simon Sinek has less some in his book so great leaders. Elast List out some. We need to start letting people know, because it's worth a few pennies if we have to pay it to support people and people need to know where to go to work. I really want to be intentional and partner up with an organization that's purposeful and intentional about their people. You opened a door.

Speaker 1:

I had to walk through it because I think the world we need it, and as much as people criticize well, maybe all people don't, but millennials are always given kind of this wrap about being a little bit flighty and those types of things Millennials tend to purchase with intention, and both Tree and I are in the food service industry and it's interesting what's come out where now, especially the younger generation is very clear and purposeful about well, I will go spend extra money if I'm going to a restaurant that shares my values or that I know the food is locally sourced, or their cage free eggs or things of that nature. So there is a growing feeling that if I can have visibility into the way you think and I think the way you think, I will patronize your organization or your products or your services, even if it costs a little bit more.

Speaker 3:

Yeah, and a lot of it is what you're saying is community. That's an important word. So didn't they start a few years ago, a small business Saturday, spend a little more, go to your main street, go meet the people, go buy the wine there, go buy the bracelet there, go talk to them. Support community, support the local farms, whatever you can, yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's funny the way our world has changed. When the old days when all you had was local, you bought local. Then the world got bigger and went bigger. And now what are we talking about? We're talking about getting back. Yeah, I spent many years in Vermont and Vermont is just is an interesting culture. We could do podcasts about Vermont in itself, but one of the things is Vermont is very much about by local, by pro. You know support the local industry support. You know all of that. But what always disappointed me was every Saturday, walmart was full, home Depot was full and it's like walk the walk. If you're going to preach it, live it. And to me, that was always the frustrating thing and that was like you've got to be able to then walk the walk when it comes to down to the pocketbook or your wallet and you're going to have to spend another $5 for it. You've got to make that commitment because otherwise you're penalizing those with good behavior.

Speaker 2:

And I just want to tie this all back in to the subject, because we're talking about purpose and we were talking about individual purpose and our own.

Speaker 2:

How do we find our purpose? But I think once you start living a life that's purpose driven and intentional, all of these things will be added onto you. So, partnering with companies that are purposeful, because you know, after you've done the hard work not the hard work, the hard, the hard work of finding a purpose you really want to make sure, when it comes down to that, how it shows up in my home, how it shows up in my career. So, all of this intention, if we can find a way to connect it, when people can truly live a purpose driven life. So that's why it's important to mention the corporation aspect of it along with it, because, for me, finding my purpose and say, okay, is there a way for me to, you know, make my purpose my career and not my daughters used to say this to me often, mom not everyone is meant to be an entrepreneur, and that's true and that's fine. So if I have this purpose and I have this intentionality, intentionality, how do I find organizations that tie into it so I can truly expand it?

Speaker 1:

You mentioned when you founded the pajama program that you said to yourself is this where I want to be for the next 30 years? And that was kind of your epiphany. What are you going to do with the next 30?

Speaker 3:

Well, I'm doing my best to inspire other people, to tell them just what we're talking about. It's never too late. You have to stop and think about what your heart's telling you. You have to know that you are individual, that there is something, that you are worth having somebody giving you a purpose. You know somebody, whether it's your God, your universe. You are here because you have a reason to be here and it's not just to go day to day with an okay existence. I just hope the people will know that it's. First of all, there's nothing that is not going to change for the better. Everything is going to be amazing once you get over the hurdles of the fear and the change and anything like that, because it's not easy but it's so worth it, it's so worth being you and you can, for the first time, bring all of you to the table.

Speaker 3:

I would hide my I love Lucy side. I would hide all the dumb things I would do. My husband now teases me Now. I put it right out there and it's freeing, but I understand that it sounds intimidating to some people. So I'm hoping, especially being honest about my financial situation. I wasn't the smartest, I just I never saved, still don't, but you know, I got into financial trouble and I met a great guy and got married and then almost ruined that. So there are a lot of lessons that I want to tell people. I don't want them to think, oh, you find your purpose and everything's going to be wonderful If all is in place. You've been just missing 90 minutes. Then everything changes. No, but it's worth it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah well, finding purpose is human right and flawed, just like we are. Yeah, so yeah, I had one other question I wanted to ask you in. This isn't meant to be macabre, but we all you know Passing on as part of life. What are we gonna put on your tombstone?

Speaker 3:

Good question. I don't think I've ever been asked that. Now you're gonna make me cry like three.

Speaker 2:

I just put my tish really.

Speaker 3:

I'm always ready. Maybe something with a Little girl touched a heart and she tried to Touched. Have that little girls heart touched the world? Something like that maybe. Because that's what it was. It was about that little girl making such, just taking my breath away. So I don't, I don't know what it would be, but if you think of something, let me know and I'll tell my family we will.

Speaker 1:

So obviously, for our listeners will have links on our, on our website, as well as on the podcast I'm giving. I'm turning it over to you, but I just want to say on a personal note, it's been a pleasure chatting with you over the last two episodes and I'm gonna throw her to tree and let her Before you throw it over me.

Speaker 2:

you throw a big question, I have my throw it back at you. What's on your tombstone?

Speaker 1:

Oh, I told you already, he lived his life and died exhausted.

Speaker 2:

He looked his life. You have one tree, whoo, I first of all leave it to me. I don't want a tombstone, I I don't want to, so and it's a blue, so you can look it up, figure why. But no, I just, I don't want anything holding me down, nothing. I've had enough over my head and held against me and and I plan on leaving this like breaking a few glass ceiling, so the don't, don't put a stone on my head.

Speaker 3:

Oh, your legacy. Let's change the word.

Speaker 2:

Yes, oh, my legacy changed the world. Oh, look at you, how do we go here? Whoo, here we go.

Speaker 1:

Bring his own tree.

Speaker 2:

Yes, my legacy. She found her purpose and she lived it to the fullest.

Speaker 2:

Beautiful so and she bought a few amazing people along with her along the way. And that's my goal. My goal is to, to, to make sure I, whatever God has given me, I take. I take whatever he gives me and I'm one. My day is over. I want to go back and one, I want him to be proud and I want to multiply it and say you gave me these two, five talents, I made it ten. And Look at all the people and look at your legacy. Your, your purpose, your pajamas and people finding a purpose will live on long after you're, you're gone, and that's a true legacy that you touched enough people that they can touch someone else and your dreams and your purpose and your vision lives on.

Speaker 3:

So no, that's that's true for everything you said about you, and you are an example.

Speaker 2:

Oh, thank you so much. This was an amazing episode, a great episode. I thank you. I I really want to leave and on this note, not only with a spirit of gratitude, we'll say this episode with air towards the end of 2023 and for everyone we love you enough to to say, please, do the work, please don't let 2024 come and not take the moment to look at thing within and say I guarantee you we all have more to give. We all have some untapped resource. Let's find it, let's tap into it and let's do our truck, our art, put our own Peace and love and happiness and growth out in the universe and and do our part to make this Planet a better place. So until we meet again, take care.

People on this episode